Passing.

Today was a big day. I finally got my driver’s license! Yes yes I know, it only took 22 years. Yes! I had put it off to the side for these last 6 years and finally came the day to do it! The nerves where there, the lady approached the car and I thought to myself “oh no! she isn’t even smiling, she is going to hate me, I’m not going to pass.” But there was a voice inside me telling me not to jump the gun, to just wait and see what would happened. The 15 minute evaluation passed and then she tells me “you got 6 errors, anything below 15 is passing.” In my head, I’m thinking “does that mean I passed, wait what.” It only took me 3 minutes to figure out that indeed I did pass! And then I thought, why had I put it off for so long? Besides it being the reason that I was lazy, I thought about my approach to life. Just because I don’t need anything at a certain time does it mean I won’t need it later? Is this how I’ve lived life? And then I thought no. Throughout the years, I have learned that things happen for a reason but nonetheless you do have a choice of what happens. I have been thinking about this a lot especially since I’m about to start a new chapter in my life very soon: my first full-time job. I keep getting nervous, excited, nervous, and then back to excited. I know it will require a lot of effort, which I’m more than willing to give. But it will be the first time in which I won’t have to worry about “passing.” Instead it will be a series of lessons from which to learn a lot from. I guess that is what grown up life is about. It’s not about whether you pass or fail. Its about what you do with the things that happen to you. And that to me is often scary. It’s like there is no correct way to evaluate your behavior as a friend, lover, employee, sister, daughter, etc. You kind of just have to ‘wing it’ and I think that is a great motto to live by. I’m 22 years old and sometimes I don’t know what I’m going to do or where my life will be in 5 years but I do know is that I want to keep learning. From all those around me and even the strangers that just smile at me in the streets. I want to try to not stress about the things I need to do to live the life that is considering ‘passing.’ I want to live the life in which I learn so much from and enjoy that ‘passing’ isn’t even an issue. And with the right company, I think I can. Actually, I know I will. 

Whatever comes, let it come. What stays, let it stay. What goes, let it go.

(via t-yger)

Sometimes, the thing you want most doesn’t happen. And sometimes, the thing you never expect does. You meet thousands of people and none of them really touch you. And then you meet one person and your life is changed… forever.

(via t-yger)

(via t-yger)